By: Katy Hunt
As soon as you announce your engagement, the questions start rolling in – “Have you picked a date?” “What’s the venue”' And sooner rather than later, “When are you starting your registry?” While building a registry should be one of the more fun wedding tasks (hello, new kitchen gadgets!), it can also feel overwhelming. What do you actually need? Where should you register? Where do you even start?! Let’s break it all down so you can create a registry that’s perfect for you and your partner – minus the stress
What Should You Put on Your Wedding Registry?
Your registry is about curating a list of items that fit your lifestyle and home not just what tradition dictates. Consider taking a walk through each room in your home and thinking about your daily routine, and take note of any “gaps” among your household items. Maybe a toaster would fit in nicely over by the refrigerator – you’ve been using the broiler in your oven to toast bread for too long now. Perhaps some linen napkins would look nice on the table – you love to entertain, after all. Or maybe your hair would become luminous and bouncy with the help of a brand new hair dryer. Small notes like these will go a long way when sitting down to complete your registry. And for whatever you miss, keep in mind that many stores provide lists or guides of basics to register for – this can help fill in any cracks, and can only give you further information!
If you already live together and have the essentials, your registry is a great chance to refresh worn-out items (looking at you, ancient vacuums with a cord) or even add fun, non-traditional gifts that align with your lifestyle. For example, do you have any hobbies that require specific gear? A pizza stone for the aspiring chef, or even camping equipment for the outdoorsy couple would be perfect for these instances! In addition, this is a perfect opportunity to think about what heirlooms you may want to receive from family members, rather than purchasing something fresh. If you’ve had your eye on Grandma’s China set and she’s assured you that it’s yours one day, drop that hint! Items like these sometimes mean that much more because they are passed down for generations.
Where Should You Register?
With so many options out there, it’s best to choose a store (or stores) that carry the items you genuinely want. Some of the most popular registry destinations we’ve seen include Target, Amazon, Crate & Barrel, and even department stores like Macy’s. The possibilities are endless, and in fact some couples even choose to register at two places in order to get a mix of items and make shopping easier for guests. Not to mention the fact that many stores offer special perks – for example, Target provides fabulous registry completion discounts (typically 10-15% off anything left on your list after the wedding).
If you’re the type of person who knows exactly what they want and is a whiz on the web, registering online is going to be your best friend. However, if you’re looking for inspiration and prefer to physically touch, feel, and see items with your own eyes, many stores allow you to register in person, the way it was traditionally done. This is your chance to live out your dream of running around a department store with a scanning gun – just like the movies! The list that is compiled is then generated into a link, just as it would if you started out online, for you to post on your wedding website or distribute to guests as you please. You can also add/remove items at any time from your own home computer – no need to go back to the store!
Many wedding websites allow you to link multiple registries in one spot, keeping everything streamlined. In fact, a feature that’s becoming increasingly popular is setting up one registry link that pulls in multiple items from multiple stores all in one place. Websites such as MyRegistry, The Knot, and Zola offer this feature – it allows you to register at many places without becoming too confusing for guests!
Registry Guilt: Should You Worry About Prices?
A lot of couples hesitate to add big-ticket items, fearing they’ll look greedy. Here’s the truth: People want to buy you gifts! And while an individual guest may not splurge on a Dyson vacuum or a complete king bedding set, you truly never know – because they just might! It’s also important to have a few larger items on your registry as many guests or bridesmaids will combine forces and funds to make sure you receive something amazing. Having a range of price points – from $20 kitchen gadgets to larger investment pieces – ensures that all guests can find something within their budget. Some guests may even grab a few of the smaller items and compile them into a beautiful basket display. So don’t shy away from adding any items, no matter how seemingly small or big.
Another option that’s available on some sites is allowing the opportunity for guests to contribute towards a specific gift. This kind of goes hand-in-hand with the whole joint-gift/combining forces idea, except in this instance the guest does not have to have a partner-in-crime in mind. For example, if you registered for a $700 Breville Espresso Machine (isn’t this everyone’s dream? No? Just me?), one guest could theoretically put $200 towards it – another guest $300, etc. etc. That way your guests are helping you get a huge-ticket item that you really want, without them going over their budget and purchasing the entire thing.
The Honeymoon Fund Debate: Is It Tacky?
In the old days, gift registries were the norm and the given because let’s face it – most people didn’t live together before marriage. But because so many couples nowadays move in together before the question is popped, you and your partner may find yourselves already stocked up on all the household essentials. In this case, a honeymoon fund can be a great alternative to a traditional registry. Some older guests may still prefer to give a physical gift, and you should let them because it will likely be something useful or even something you never thought about (you can always return it!). But framing your fund as a way to contribute to specific experiences, like a sunset cruise or a couples’ spa day, can make it feel more personal for guests. This is a great way for you to have a more lavish vacation without having to spend even more money after planning a whole wedding. Luckily, many wedding registry sites now offer honeymoon fund options, making it easy for guests to contribute in a meaningful way.
Bridal/Wedding Shower: Where Does Your Registry Fit In?
Now, let’s talk about how your registry plays into your bridal/wedding shower, and the big day itself. Typically, bridal or couples' showers are gift-giving occasions. Some guests prefer to physically bring gifts from the registry to the shower so the bride or couple has something fun to open, while others may ship them directly to your home.
Something to keep in mind: shower gifts and wedding gifts are not necessarily one in the same. People love you so much, you will probably be getting gifts for both events! Shower gifts can generally be anything from the registry – think kitchen gadgets and home items – while wedding gifts tend to be cash or checks. That being said, it’s not uncommon for guests who did not attend the shower to send a registry gift to your home as a wedding present! Some guests will give gifts for both occasions (likely those that attend both the shower and the wedding), while others may only give one (those who did not attend the shower) – either way, it’s all about celebrating you!
In addition, some showers have the tradition of opening gifts in front of guests, while others opt for a “display shower,” where gifts remain unwrapped and simply set out for everyone to see. If you’re not into opening gifts in front of an audience, talk to your host about a display option – and make sure it’s indicated on your shower invitation! Or, simply just don’t open gifts – no need to create a display.
However you choose to handle gifts at your shower or wedding, it’s important to take note of exactly who gets you what, so that you can ensure “thank you” cards are sent in the appropriate fashion. Definitely show your gratitude for all the love you’re getting, and make it personal! For shower gifts, we’d recommend aiming to send your thank yous within 2-3 weeks of the event, whereas for wedding gifts, we’d say within 3 months after the wedding.
Final Thoughts
Your wedding registry should be fun, functional, and totally tailored to your needs. Add what you love, skip what you don’t, and don’t feel guilty about including big-ticket items—your guests want to celebrate you, at your shower and on your big day!
Happy registering!
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